Win the Battle, Forfeit the War…

"He who goes to War alone, May win a few battles, But will always Lose the War."

Me and I: The Strength in Asking for Help

“I will not be a beggar, I would starve first.”

Pride is solely dependent upon perspective. With opportunity, pride grows. It's easy to declare, "It's better to starve than beg," when you have the means to secure even a morsel of food each day. It's easy to claim you don't need help if you can still drag yourself forward, inch by inch. After all, you'll get there eventually, and you won't owe anyone.

Yet, daily challenges compel us to examine how much pride we cling to. It's the little things that accumulate over time—the small inequities that seem insignificant until they're all thrown into the same basket we carry throughout our day. When something, whether small or large, is added atop everything else, suddenly we're dragged down, unable to bear the weight. In these moments, it's difficult to stand up again. We must change our perspective, for in these times, many believe they must forsake their pride to ask for help, fearing that whoever they ask may later use it against them.

Them

There exists a multitude who prey on the bleeding and broken—scavengers who would exploit everything against you if given the chance. However, these scavengers are not as abundant as they seem; they are a lazy segment of humanity that doesn't hunt but waits for their prey to be broken before attempting to use them. To encounter one of them, you must have denied all others who offered a hand to catch you on the way down. You denied them all to avoid indebtedness, to avoid appearing weak, so no one would know how much help you needed.

The Thief and The General

Over their lives, they had led very different courses. The Thief trusted no one, not even those of his trade. Always going about and stealing what he could, but never able to land the truly great scores, as those required partners. He only ever asked for help when he had no other choice, then proceeded to run away from the deals he made.

The General grew up alone and unloved by those close to him. However, he was a great strategist and excelled at playground games. Whenever teams were required, he would go out of his way to ask those he knew could help him win to be on his team. Eventually, he became a General later in life, still seeking out those to join his team.

It so happened one day that The Thief wandered into a tavern that the General was also visiting. The Thief meandered to the bar, stealing several baubles on the way, and then saw the General with all his shiny gold medals—a perfect target, he thought. He took a seat by the General to get close and steal the gold. The General had spotted him immediately; his shifty eyes and crafty fingers had already picked a few pockets on the way in. How this man lived pained the General's heart. How had this man come to this point? So, he decided to talk to him.

Though the Thief was focused on the gold, the General was persistent in getting to know his story. For unknown reasons, the Thief let him and proceeded to ask about the General too.

“Have you ever made a deal with the Devil?" - The Thief

"No. Why would I need to?" - The General

"You're lucky to be able to think that. But everyone needs help sometimes. Sometimes it doesn't come from where you want." - The Thief

"Not lucky. Though it's true everyone needs help sometimes. But it only ever comes from where you ask for it and from whom you accept it." - The General

The Thief pondered this odd statement. Help had not often been given to him, and most times he had refused it, thinking he didn't need it. However, as time wore on, places to find help became scarce indeed—until only in dire moments when he could only deal with devils much worse than himself.

The General watched his companion turn silent and thoughtful. He decided something then. He turned to the Thief and said, "I will be going now, but I believe I may need your help someday. If you would allow me to call on you then." The Thief looked up in shock. Him? Help? This General?

"What could you possibly want my help for? You must have others who would help you, or you could do whatever it is by yourself just fine," said the Thief, now slightly offended that this man who had so much would ask something of him.

The General stood up, paid his tab, and grabbed his bags. Then he turned and smiled at the Thief.

"Fear not, you can call upon me for help as well."

"I would never do that!" exclaimed the Thief. "And I still don't know how I could ever help you, so it doesn't matter. I don't know why you would bother asking in the first place."

The General, still smiling, said, "It matters not then, does it?" He winked at the Thief and chuckled. "But do you want to know why I am a great General? It's because I ask those who are worthy to help me."

"That's nonsense, old man," said the Thief. "Asking for help just means you're weak." The Thief turned away, having had enough of the General.

The General merely chuckled and began to walk away but turned back after a few steps and said,

“Why should I not ask for help? It just means there are those who would fight by my side and see me to victory."

The Thief turned towards him, astonished and shocked. The General smiled and turned away, shouting, "I'll call on you for help one day!"

The General had just turned his whole life around. It was not weak to ask for help; it just meant there are those who would believe in you enough to fight your fight together. The Thief smiled as he realized this. Right as the General stepped out the door, the Thief came to and shouted, "And I will call upon you!"

After that miraculous encounter, the Thief went on to pull off some of the greatest heists of the century. He searched long and hard and found those worthy to help him in his cause and fight by his side. He acquired a team unlike any others, and they were never caught.

One day, long after the General and Thief were both retired, they somehow found themselves at the same tavern. They greeted each other as old friends and talked late into the day about their many exploits and the people they had found to fight by their sides.

They were great friends until the end of their days, and their lives were filled with joy and camaraderie.

“It is a weak mind that will not allow others to fight with them. It is a strong mind that can lead an army."

The Power of Asking for Help

Asking for help can often make us feel vulnerable. We usually think—somewhat erroneously—that we should be able to do everything ourselves or that by admitting we need help, we're somehow being weak. Many of us also get nervous about hearing "no," and by asking others for support, we put ourselves out there and risk being rejected.

However, asking for help is essential for personal and professional growth. It fosters collaboration, strengthens relationships, and allows for the exchange of knowledge and support. It also demonstrates humility and a willingness to learn while helping you better overcome challenges you might otherwise struggle with.

The Importance of Teamwork

Teamwork is essential to success. Each individual has unique gifts, talents, and skills. When we bring them to the table and share them for a common purpose, it can give a real competitive advantage.

Research shows that collaborative problem-solving leads to better outcomes. People are more likely to take calculated risks that lead to innovation if they have the support of a team behind them. Working in a team encourages personal growth, increases job satisfaction, and reduces stress.

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